Erectile issues are more common than you think.
I had no idea how common erectile issues were until I started dating. It is SO much more common than you would think. The last time I dated was in high school and you only had to so much as look at a boy in a suggestive way and he had a rock hard erection. As an adult however, I’ve run into erectile issues enough to think it’s worth a conversation. Men can have a hard time maintaining their erection for several reasons. Of course there certain medical reasons and medications, but there are a whole slew of other reasons that will put a real damper in the bedroom. This blog is inspired by an experience with someone who admittedly liked to watch a lot of porn. He watched so much porn, in fact, that IT satisfied his need for sex for quite some time and he had only just begun dating again because he missed companionship. After several dates I learned he had seen a doctor because he had a hard time maintaining an erection. He explained to his physician that not only did he watch porn several times a day but he also practiced “edging” a technique where you get yourself close to orgasm several times through sex or masturbation but stop right before you explode and then do it again. This technique can do several things, it can ultimately make the orgasm feel more intense because the build-up is longer and it can help lengthen the time before ejaculation.
As we all know standing close to the edge of anything can be exhilarating but it comes with a certain amount of risk and edging in sex is no different. Excessive edging coupled with hours of porn had created erectile issues. The minute it was time for sex with a real person he immediately went limp. Nothing worse than being in the heat of the moment for the first time with someone and they stop to ask “do you mind if I turn on porn, it will help me”. My response to this would be, “Ummm all the help you need is right here in these jeans!”. This creates the not so pleasant thought of, “am I not enough to keep him aroused?” while trying to initiate a sexual experience, and frankly if I had a dick, mine would have been soft in that moment too with those thoughts!
Watching too much porn can be a problem if you relate with this fantasy type sex so much so, that you cannot enjoy sex with a real human. The combination of excessive porn coupled with edging, and this guy had a major issue. Not only could he not keep his erection if he wasn’t looking at porn but he also couldn’t achieve orgasm for hours due to edging so much. Porn can be a great way to spice it up, have some fun and be exploratory with your sexual partner but if it interferes with real sex, we have a real problem.