Most of us will agree that sex is great. It’s fun, active, and a way to connect with others while learning more about yourself. And, while there are endless ways to be sexually intimate, most of us pull from a pretty standard list of ‘the classic’ positions. One such position is the standard cowgirl position. (FYI: I’m going to use the pronoun ‘he’ here and use a heterosexual scenario for my rant, but feel free to swap it for ‘she’ with a dildo if you prefer). Most of you probably know what I’m talking about, but this is when the man lays on his back and the woman straddles him and then rides him in whatever style works for them.
This sex position is solid. It gives the guy a breather, it puts the woman’s body on display, and – theoretically – gives the woman the reins for bit. Plus, if you tilt your hips just so there is a greater chance for clitoral stimulation during penetration (although that’s what fingers are for!). Sometimes, these elements of the position can make women nervous – maybe the woman is nervous about her rhythmic ability or cardiovascular endurance or whether she should bounce more, gyrate, or rock (men – give her some sexy feedback here!); maybe they are body insecure and don’t want to be so visible (blindfold him! Or -better yet – decide to be confident!); maybe THE MAN CAN’T STOP EFFING UP THE FLOW.
On behalf of all women who want to have sex on top let me write an open letter to men: “Hey Guys? We will take it from here. Stop moving. Let us lead. And, if you want to move – you better move with us. The pounding from below is the equivalent of backseat driving and we’re taking a stand against it. Don’t backseat drive our sex experience while we trying to masturbate ourselves against your lower abdomen. You’re mucking up our mojo. Stop. We mean it. Like, Don’t even move. It’s our turn to pleasure ourself at our pace using your body. Get in our vaginas and out of our way. Love, Spice.”
Have fun. Be sexy. I’ll see you on top.