Dating after divorce-Too much romance isn’t good

Gross, disgusted, romance,

This entry is about romance, how much is too much? Met a nice guy and it seemed like there was some chemistry.  Active, successful father of two, He was promising on paper and I was excited when he asked me out. I thought it was especially thoughtful when he asked what I liked, and said he was going to plan a date around that.  I thought it was thoughtful yes, but I was also totally stumped.  What do I like?  I’m still learning what I like frankly. I mean… I know what I don’t like! But what do you tell a guy you like, when he is trying to plan a date!? I like vacations to the south of France??

I just blurted out a few random things that came to mind first.  I like the coast, I like hikes, I like being outdoors, I like sunsets because I’m not up early enough to watch the sun rise.  He said that was enough and asked me if I would meet him in a small coastal city and suggested a restaurant he liked.  I immediately googled it.  Swanky, right on the beach with phenomenal views and good ratings.  Picked a cute outfit and off I went!

We met at the restaurant and he had a basket and a rose.  I was very impressed by the thoughtfulness to bring a flower and started walking toward the front door of the restaurant when he said “I actually thought we could take a walk on the beach first”.  Another great idea I thought!  “Sure” I said so we took our shoes off and started walking on the beach.  A few minutes later he pulled a blanket out of the basket and said “let’s sit”.  Next he produced a very impressive bottle of champagne, a bluetooth speaker, another blanket (for my shoulders in case I got cold), and two champagne glasses.  Still thoroughly impressed, I thanked him for the blanket for my shoulders and graciously accepted the glass of champagne.  Two glasses of bubbly later, I was feeling very chatty and a little fuzzy frankly, but I did notice he kept looking at his watch.  I asked him if we should get going back to the restaurant and he said it wasn’t time yet.  We continued talking and after checking his watch again he said, “its time, watch the sunset!”  Oh I thought, that’s what he was looking at his watch for.  I watched the sunset and smiling looked back at him to thank him and instantly his lips were on mine, just that fast.  I pulled away but he leaned in further and said, “we can’t stop kissing, the sun hasn’t finished setting yet!”  Ok, a little cheesy but I like romance, so I went with it.  The kiss wasn’t great, in fact it was bad.  I’d liken it to kissing sushi.  It didn’t stink or anything, but it was cold and kind of damp. Yuck, I smiled politely and asked if he wanted to head up to the restaurant.  He said “yes but first let me find the cork!”  The cork, what the hell did we need the cork for?  Oh I thought, he must be one of those guys that’s really into recycling or something and didn’t want to leave the cork as litter on the beach?  I waited but I was getting cold and 10 minutes later he was still scouring the sand for the champagne cork!  “Umm, could we head in it’s getting pretty cold out here”  He said “no, we have to find the cork!”  I said something to him then about it not being a big deal and he looked at me with this look of disappointment on his face and said “you have to keep the cork to remember our first date!”  Oh Jesus I thought, I’m going to remember this date when I catch a cold from shivering on this beach, while you comb the sand on your hands and knees which by the way isn’t a sexy angle for you!  But of course, I didn’t tell him that.

The date continued like this.  Opening doors, pulling out chairs, insisting he order for me, pairing everything we ordered with a different wine.  He even asked the waiter to take a photo of us for our first date memory and asked me if I wanted the drink napkin with the name of the restaurant on it!!

He later admitted that he watched episodes of the Bachelor to learn what types of dates to take women on and it works well for him.  I couldn’t help but think, apparently it doesn’t work that well because you’re still single!!  Another sushi kiss later I was in my car and on my way home.  Of course I called Spice to fill her in on the details of the date I had been so excited about,  She stopped me at the beach scene and told me she threw up in her mouth a little lol!

I love romance, but it’s all about delivery.  Too much all at once comes across as cheesy and over the top.  Maybe if he did the champagne before dinner on the beach and then pulled my hair a little while he kissed me…that would have been more than enough romance for the night.  The rest, coupled with his cold lips made me turn down date 2.


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