Hugs Should Come With A Caution Sign

hugs, danger, danger zone, mistake jar, chemistry, vibes, sex, great sex, smell, connection, relationships, dating, intimacy, here we go again

Well, I did a thing today.  More specifically, I did a person.  And, it was that damn guy who keeps hurting my heart (see: Another One Bites The Dust)

He sent me a text wishing me a happy birthday a few days back and mentioned he had something for me if “i was comfortable with him dropping it off.”  I consented and we scheduled for the drop off to happen today.

I knew it was probably a mistake the minute I opened the door and my whole body started vibrating at the sight and smell of him.  I gave him a super brief hug and invited him in for some coffee.  I made sure to sit as far away from him as possible at the table, but no amount of distance would have been enough to counteract the sexual inertia that was slowly dragging us closer together.  It was like freaking quick sand.

We caught up on life and I continuously dodged the topic of our last uncomfortable interaction and attempted to keep our conversation superficial and casual.  About an hour into our meet up, I could sense the energy has fully shifted.  I looked up at him and his eyes told me everything I needed to know before his mouth uttered the words, “I’ve really missed you.”  “I’ve missed you too,” I replied.  “Hug?” he asked with a sheepish smile.  I paused, not sure if I could manage my composure while being that close to him.

“Sure,” I said as I stood to hug him.  We reached for each other and our bodies melted together as they had so many times before.  I could feel he was already hard through my dress and I’m sure he could feel my heart pounding.  We stood that way for a long while and his scent was intoxicatingly familiar.  I couldn’t catch my breath and felt paralyzed by the warm, muscular arms encircling me.  “This is the most intense hug I’ve ever experienced,” he whispered as he shifted his body even closer to mine.  I inhaled sharply as I felt exactly how intense the moment was getting for him through the thin fabric of our clothing.

Our bodies were both tense with anticipation and guardedness.  Both unclear where we’d end up next – or if we wanted to find out.  Nature won.  His voice seemed impossibly deep as he whispered, “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to take you on this emotional roller coaster with me.” And then, he lifted my chin so our mouths could meet.

The passion was severe.  The minute we crossed the line we were in a full on frenzy to experience each other.  We touched, and licked, and kissed, and smelled and looked at everything we’d been missing.  I felt like an addict who went on a bender.  A recovering alcoholic who’d fallen off the wagon.  Occasionally, one of us would surface into consciousness and check in with the other: “are you okay?” – knowing that what we meant was, “can your heart handle another round of this chaos? can you survive me again?”

I smell like him.  And, it feels like the way I’m supposed to smell.

Hugs are dangerous.  Spread the word.

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